Beauty and the Beast - Fanfiction archives

I do not own the premise of this Beauty and the Beast or any other (currently). This is simply my muse whispering in my ear, "What if...?" The story picks up toward the end of episode 1.09 as Catherine speeds off to find Vincent. I change nothing that the CW has done so far but merely embellish and move forward. Hope you enjoy.

PLEASE if you read this, leave a comment. Even if you don't like it (I only ask that you be civil). I want honest evaluation of my writing.

Chapter One - Exposed

Come on Vincent, answer! Catherine’s desperate, unspoken demand silently willed him to pick up the phone and talk to her. She had to see him, to connect with him… to make amends for her behavior at the wedding reception. Vincent’s voicemail kicked in, and she punched the disconnect button in frustration, then immediately redialed. He couldn't ignore her calls all night… could he? Pain stabbed through her heart at the thought he might do just that. She glanced up at the rear-view mirror, only half noticing the reckless swerving of the car behind her. If she hadn't been so distracted she might have realized what was about to happen before it was too late…

Vincent stared at the display on his phone, his heart torn. More than anything he wanted to talk to Catherine, but after what happened earlier, he wasn't sure that was wise. He had already let his guard down with her once, foolishly thinking that they could have some sort of relationship. He should have known better. He was a cursed man-beast who didn't deserve to be loved, especially by someone like Catherine. He could still feel her words twisting in his gut as she told him he was becoming more “animal”. And when he said he needed to leave, he had secretly wanted for her to beg him to stay, to weather the storm in her arms, but her response was to basically tell him that loving him was too big a risk. He supposed he couldn’t blame her, but it still hurt like hell.

If he was in his right mind, he would admit to himself that the very things about her that made him want her were the very things that he would eventually destroy – her goodness, her honesty – things that already were suffering as she lied over and over to the people she loved and respected on a daily basis, just to keep him safe. Not to mention protecting him from murder charges…

His heart sank as he watched the call roll over to voicemail and disappear for the second time. No matter how much he knew in his head that he needed to let her go, to let her have a real life, his heart insisted on clinging to the irrational hope that maybe… somehow… someday… things would work out between them, if only he had faith.

As his phone began ringing for the third time in as many minutes, he couldn't help himself and he pushed the talk button to answer it. But what he heard was the last thing he expected. He stood frozen as the sound of shattering glass and crunching metal assaulted his ears – just before he heard Catherine scream and a lot of crashing that sounded like a car rolling right before the line went dead. “Cat-?” he choked out, but there was no response except silence. “Catherine!” he screamed into the night, then turned and ran. He retraced the path back toward the reception, knowing it was the same route that Catherine would travel to return to the city. He ran faster than he ever had in his life, needing to find her, to make sure that she was alright. She had to be alright. His life wouldn't be worth living if anything ever happened to her. He had almost reached the highway when he heard the shots…

Please God, Catherine pleaded, as white-hot pain seared through her shoulder. Please don’t let me die here, now, like this. Not before I get a chance to tell Vincent- Her thoughts began fading into darkness as her brain purposed to shut down her consciousness in an attempt to dampen the pain. As if from a great distance she heard someone calling her name… Vincent… She tried to answer; tried to call out to him, but nothing worked. It was like she was trapped inside her body, screaming at the top of her lungs to a world that couldn't hear her. There was a sound of wrenching metal that might have been right next to her, or a mile away. In her half-conscious haze she couldn't be sure. But the one thing she was sure of was that with utmost care, her beast was lifting her out of the twisted metal prison and cradling her close to his heart, nuzzling her with his cheek so tenderly that it would be hard for anyone who witnessed it to ever think him to be a crude, unfeeling creature. Her last fleeting thought was how she wished she could touch his cheek and tell him how much she loved him. Then, knowing that she was safe in Vincent’s arms, Catherine finally let go and slipped into a dark cocoon of oblivion.

“Is that my car?!” Evan noted the edge of terror in Heather’s question. He couldn't blame her. He was feeling pretty terrified at the moment himself. The wreck he was looking at in front of him didn't bode well for the driver. And that was indeed her car… “Cat!” Heather’s cry hit his ears at the same moment he saw an imposing figure walk into the path of the headlights, carrying the limp form of a woman. There was no doubt as to who she was. But who was the man? The way he held her – rocked her - seemed almost as if he was someone who… cherished her. But something else about him made the hair rise on the back of Evan’s neck. Somewhere in his subconscious, pieces were starting to fall into place, even if fear was keeping his mind from processing the evidence it was logging. But instinct was strong, and as he jumped from the car he commanded Heather to stay put. There was just something about the silhouette of this stranger… the way he moved… Evan proceeded with caution, not quite sure what to expect.

Nearing the scene, he could hear ragged breathing. Deep, hoarse breaths that sounded almost… not human. Could it be…? The situation was getting more complicated by the moment. He had no idea what kind of reasoning capabilities a cross-species being possessed – oh yes, he knew in his gut that’s who he was dealing with – so he moved slowly, never taking his eyes from the beast. As he drew closer he called out calmly, “It’s alright, I’m here to help.” His biggest fear was not that the creature would harm Catherine – not with the almost reverent way it cradled her so protectively. But he had to make sure it didn't bolt and take Catherine away from the help she obviously needed.

Evan only advanced a couple more steps before the beast lifted his face from where it had been nestled against Catherine’s, and looked squarely into Evan’s face. It was a sight Evan would remember for the rest of his life, as he stared at this deformed creature – half man, half… something else – who had tears streaming down his cheeks and looked as if its whole world was about to end. “Please…. Help…. Her….” Although the gravelly voice could only be classified as inhuman, there was no denying the tenderness and sense of helplessness encompassed in the desperate plea. Apparently the human DNA still allowed it a degree of rational thought, to understand the gravity of the situation and acknowledge that he was in no position or shape to be the one to help her. It had reasoned out that her best hope was to get someone else to care for her, even if it meant exposing himself to a stranger.

The creature’s head jerked up and it became agitated, eyes getting wild with fear as it began to move restlessly. What had spooked it, Evan wondered? “Please… help…” the beast stammered again, starting to pace in little circles, holding Catherine closer to him. Evan knew that if he didn't calm it down, it was going to be a flight risk, in spite wanting help for Catherine. But before he could act or even think about doing anything, the creature walked right up to him and demanded, “Take!” It emphasized what it meant by holding Catherine’s body out for Evan to hold. It was then that Evan heard the first screams of the approaching emergency vehicles and understood what had upset the beast. It didn't want to be seen. It had already revealed itself to Evan and couldn't take any more chances.

As the monster-man gently laid Catherine in Evan’s arms, Evan was suddenly confronted with the dilemma about what he was going to do concerning this creature that had risked exposing itself against its own sense of self-preservation to save his friend and co-worker. He instinctively knew beyond the shadow of a doubt that this was the secret Cat had been keeping from them all for the last few months. He and Tess had engaged in more than one conversation about how distant their friend had become and how she seemed to be withdrawing into herself, often disappearing with the lamest excuses. Now he knew why. After all, this wasn't the kind of secret you shared with even your best girlfriend. But he also knew Cat, and if she felt that this man-beast was worth protecting, he wouldn't go against her wishes, at least until he had a chance to talk to her.

He looked down at her lying so limp and still in his arms. If he got a chance to talk to her. He hoped with all his heart that he would. When he looked up again, the beast was gone. But his gut told him the creature hadn't gone far.

Chapter Two – Primal Grief

Vincent’s beast remained hidden in the shadows of the forest along the highway, watching as the paramedics tended to Catherine. His eyes never left her face, his heart breaking inside his chest, fighting with every ounce of his humanity to keep from roaring like the wounded beast that he was. Even if he had been in full human form he would have struggled to maintain his silence. For all the years he’d been on the run, all he’d seen – all he’d done that he’d regretted with every fiber of his being - he’d never felt the kind of soul-searing pain he was experiencing now. If she didn't make it…

His fists clenched. No. She had to make it. It couldn't end like this. He couldn't lose her now, never having told her what she meant to him. Not that he could stand losing her period, but to lose all opportunity and hope of ever telling her how much he loved her? It was unthinkable. Vincent’s head was clearing just a little, his beast receding ever so slightly to afford him some rational thought, which was almost more painful for the mental anguish he had to deal with in addition to the primal emotions that were raging through him.

God, he’d been such a fool to walk away from her earlier. Why had he let his stupid pride stand between him and the woman he loved? His mind had been reeling from the shocking revelation that not only had Evan been “studying” him – specifically his DNA – but that apparently the humanity he still possessed was now in danger. Sure, Catherine had some sort of feelings for him now… but what if things progressed to where he lost more and more of what made him the man she cared for? What if she eventually had to turn him in and have him locked up to keep him from hurting himself, others, or – God forbid! – herself? He didn't want her pity, or to be a burden on her. All he wanted was to be with her; to grow old together, to spend a lifetime loving her, and be loved in return. He knew it was a pipe dream but it was one he’d been nursing for the last 9 years as he watched her grow into the beautiful, strong, confident woman she was today.

He watched as the ambulance pulled away from the scene, lights flashing and sirens blaring. He was just about to turn, when he saw Evan glance in his direction. He knew that the other man couldn't see him, but it was an acknowledgment that Catherine’s co-worker knew he was there, somewhere, watching over her. He wondered how someone he’d just met could have discerned so much in those few moments, but there wasn’t any point wasting time trying to reason it out, especially when his judgment was still clouded. He watched as Heather, with her heart beating erratically and her breathing ragged, walked into Evan’s embrace sobbing. Evan held her and rocked her gently, although his eyes never stopped scanning the woods for some sign of the beast he’d met. A part of Vincent was relieved at the prospect that maybe Evan would turn his affection to Catherine’s sister. He didn't want to be in competition with someone that now knew he existed. The man could ruin everything. But it was a chance Vincent had had to take in order to save Catherine. Even in his right mind he would have made the same decision again a thousand times, because she was far more important to him than his own life. Finally, he disappeared deep into the woods, heading back to the one person that could help him now – JT.

JT was busy beefing up the security system when he heard Vincent come crashing into the warehouse. He lifted his head and listened – normally Vincent was as stealthy as a hunting lioness. Something must be wrong if he was charging around like a wounded-

His thoughts were interrupted as Vincent came crashing through the door into the loft. When JT caught sight of his friend he froze, half from shock, half from fear. Vincent seemed to be stuck in some ‘tween state, half man, half the beast, and he was looking pretty wild-eyed. Was this some sort of new fugue state surfacing? His eyes never leaving the beast, he began to fumble for the case that held his tranquilizer gun. He’d been tossed like a ragdoll into the concrete wall once before, and he wasn't exactly eager to be tossed like a sack of potatoes again. He would trust Vincent with his life when Vincent was in his right mind. But like this? Who knew what could happen? Although…

He paused a moment to really look at the beast before him. Something was definitely different about this manifestation. He wasn't raging, throwing things and generally tearing up the place. He just stood there, staring at JT, looking…. wounded. “Ohmygod, Vincent are you alright?” All thoughts of personal safety fled JT’s mind as he rushed to his friend’s side.

For all JT’s bluster, Vincent was his weakness, and the depths of his compassion for his best friend knew no bounds. It’s what had spurred him to spend literally thousands of hours in the past decade reading and studying and researching, desperately trying to find a way to reverse the experiment that had ruined Vincent’s life. Sure, he had had to cut himself off socially from the rest of civilization to keep this secret they shared. But Vincent was his friend and something unspeakable had been done to him. What kind of friend would he be, if he turned his back on a man that had lost so much – endured so much? He never could have lived with himself. And in all honesty, it never even crossed his mind.

He watched in horror as Vincent fell to his knees and gave a roar that was so desolate it could only mean one thing. JT dropped to the floor in front of him and grasped his friend’s shoulders gently. “It’s Catherine, isn't it? Something happened to her?” JT hadn't really expected a verbal response. He’d never been able to converse with Vincent in this state before. So he was startled when Vincent answered him in a deep, hoarse, semi-human voice filled with despair.

“Accident… hospital…. WHY?!” A primal sob erupted from him, and in a fit of helpless misery he slammed his fists on the floor, shattering the boards and embedding splinters into his hands and wrists. With another roar he yanked his fists back up through the planks and stared at the spikes of wood sticking out of them.

JT held out his hand toward Vincent. “Here, let me help,” he commanded gently. Vincent was breathing heavily from the stress of trying to keep himself somewhat together, but with some of his rage now spent, he did as he was instructed and held out his hands to let JT remove the fragments of wood from his thickened skin.

“Do you know what hospital they took her to?” he asked, as he yanked a particularly nasty piece of splintered wood from the back of Vincent’s hand, hoping to distract him from the pain. No such luck. He paused, waiting very still when his friend growled and winced. “O-kay,” Vincent ground out, letting JT know it was safe to continue. JT was still astonished at this new aspect of the beast. Could Vincent be somehow willing to keep the beast at bay, knowing how much was at stake for Catherine?

“Don’t… know,” Vincent said all of a sudden, breaking into JT’s clinical musings.

“Hu-what?” JT struggled to connect the dots and figure out what Vincent was trying to say. He really needed to keep his mind in the present and leave the analysis until after the crisis was over. “Oh – the hospital. Well then, as soon as we finish this little chore I’ll just call around and locate which ER she was taken to. I doubt they’ll tell me much, but at least we’ll know where to head off to.”

Vincent was overwhelmed by JT’s kindness. He knew his friend had grave misgivings about his “relationship” with Detective Chandler, but none of that seemed to matter just now. JT was being the supportive friend, taking charge, and bearing some of the burden of the situation that was like a crushing weight on Vincent’s chest. He felt his heart rate start to slow and his breathing evened out a little more. JT was unaware of the changes because his attention was on getting the last of the splinters out of Vincent’s hands. His speech was still slightly stilted, though his voice sounding more like himself when he said softly, “Thank you, JT.”

JT’s head snapped up and he assessed Vincent’s condition. He heaved a mental sigh of relief to see his friend looking more like himself than he had just a few minutes ago. “Hey – no problem, man,” was all he said. The one thing that Vincent didn't need from his friend was pity, and well JT knew it. “All done,” he announced, and then before things could get any sappier between them, he vaulted to his feet and crossed the room to his desk, intent on calling the local ER’s to find where Catherine had been taken.

Vincent sat and watched thoughtfully as JT took control of the situation, his mind partially distracted from his agony. He realized for the first time since this whole nightmare began that for all that had gone wrong in his life, he did have things to be profoundly grateful for. And JT was near the top of the list… right behind Catherine. He was humbled by the thought of how many people there were in this world that weren’t as fortunate as he was. What a jerk he’d been walking away from his precious Catherine, hurting her and pushing away something a lot of people would die to experience – pure, unconditional love. Yes, he was blessed. He just hoped that his epiphany wasn't too late, and hadn't come at an unspeakable price.

His attention quickly returned to the situation at hand when he heard JT conversing with someone about Catherine’s condition. He’d found her! Vincent’s heart began to race again, this time from elation as he realized Catherine was still alive, and as long as she was breathing, there was hope. He wouldn't allow himself to consider any other possibilities. If it was within his power, he would will her back to his side, and if given a second chance, he promised the universe right then and there that he would never squander it away or take the future for granted again. He scrambled to his feet and began pacing, anxious for JT to hang up so he could know what the hospital’s side of the conversation was.

“Well, she’s at Sinai, and they’re prepping her for surgery,” JT announced as he disconnected the call. “She’s pretty messed up from the crash, but it’s the gunshot wound that has them worried?! Just what haven’t you told me here, Vincent?” JT was back to his normal, edgy self.

Vincent reached up and rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah, about that… apparently the accident wasn't so… accidental. You know that Sabrina Meyer woman that Cat was going to take down for murder? She rammed Catherine’s car and from the looks of it, it flipped over at least a couple times – anyway, she didn't want to take any chances that the injuries wouldn't kill Catherine, so she shot her.”

“Oh. My. God. Did she get away? Wait… how do you know it was Sabrina?”

In spite of the tragic situation, Vincent actually lifted one corner of his mouth in a half-smirk. His Catherine was an amazing woman, and he was so proud of what she’d done. “I know it was Sabrina because somehow – and I have no idea where she got the strength after seeing how wrecked that car was – Catherine managed to shoot the matchmaker from hell, and she was just lying on the road when I got there.” He suddenly sobered at another disturbing thought. “You know, I was so fixated on making sure Catherine was safe, I never even noticed what happened to Sabrina. It’s an awful thing to say, but I kind of hope she was already gone when the emergency crews got there. I’d say she got what she deserved.”

“Well, I can ask when we get to the hospital. You best get out of that suit and into some comfortable traveling clothes. It’ll make you less conspicuous.” For the first time it registered with Vincent that he’d still been in his suit from the wedding when Evan had found him holding an unconscious Catherine. He couldn't help wondering what kind of conclusions Mr. Hotshot M.E. drew from that scenario. He bolted up the stairs to change, suppressing a smile at the thought.

Chapter Three – Busted!

Vincent paced nervously around the perimeter of the Mt. Sinai campus, anxiously waiting for some word from JT about Catherine’s condition. Even though it had only been 15 minutes since they arrived, it seemed like an eternity. God, he didn’t even know if the bullet had gone clean through or was lodged somewhere in her shoulder! Had it hit an artery? He’d noticed quite a bit of blood on the sleeve of his suit coat where his arm had supported Cat behind that injured shoulder. He wasn’t sure, but he didn’t think it was enough to indicate a serious bleeder. Now, in full possession of his rational senses, he realized how dangerous it had been to pluck her out of the car instead of keeping her still. But his beast knew no reason when it came to her. The only way he knew to protect her was to be a barrier between Catherine and anyone trying to harm her. Dr. Vincent Keller, though, knew that sometimes the best way to help someone was with your brain, not your brawn. He sighed. All he could do was hope and pray that he hadn’t done more damage than good when he had moved her.

His cell ringing snapped him out of his dark thoughts. “Yeah, what did you find out?” he asked without preamble.

“She’s still in surgery, obviously, and we won’t know anything definite for at least another hour. But apparently the bullet did exit without doing extensive damage so that’s something to be thankful for. They weren’t sure about internal injuries from the crash though. Hopefully surgery will be in and out and they won’t find any more problems to deal with.”

Vincent knew that JT couldn’t see his nod of agreement, but he was too choked up to speak at the moment, thinking as he was about the endless possibilities of the types of injuries Catherine could have sustained that the naked eye couldn’t detect. And he hadn’t had a chance to look her over with a clinical eye and a clear head before he’d handed her off to Evan. “Keep me posted,” he finally managed to say on a strangled growl of frustration. How he wanted to be with her! He wanted to make sure that she got the absolute best care and even then he wanted to be able to oversee her treatment to make sure nobody screwed up. Not that the staff at Mt. Sinai were incompetent, it was just that he had a vested interest in making sure no oversights occurred. But for now, all he could do was resume his relentless pacing of the blocks surrounding the place where the woman he loved more than his own life fought for hers. And try to keep as calm as possible.

JT slipped the phone into his pocket and walked back to the ER to wait for news. As he entered the waiting room he quickly realized his mistake. “YOU!” JT’s head snapped up and looked in the direction of the voice only to see Catherine’s partner and M.E. friend barreling down on him. He suddenly felt caged, and turned to hastily retreat through the doors he had just entered. It was no use though; Tess and Evan were hot on his heels and he had barely cleared the building before they grabbed him. “Stop right there,” Tess commanded as she flashed her badge. “NYPD. We have some questions for you.”

Since escape was out of the question, JT opted to play dumb. He turned to face them with an “I’m clueless” smile he had worked hard to perfect. “Questions? Me? Whatever about?”

“You know exactly what about,” Evan growled menacingly. “First you break into my lab and try to sabotage my work, and now you turn up here - wait. Why are you here?”

“Huh? Oh, uh… I’m just checking on… a friend. But I can come back later, really.” JT tried to sidestep Evan, but it was no use.

“I don’t think so. You’re up to something and I want to know what it is. Are you here because of Catherine? Is that it?” A fuzzy thought was starting to form in the periphery of Evan’s mind and warning bells were telling him to tread carefully with this conversation in front of Tess. He still didn’t know the extent of Cat’s relationship with this cross-species humanoid, and what her reasons were for lying to her closest friends about it. Until he did, he wasn’t going to betray her confidence that had been given to him without her consent. Just as JT was about to open his mouth to say something, Evan stopped him. “Hold that thought…. Tess? Can you please go wait inside for news about Catherine?”

“But-“

“Please, Tess, for me? There are some… sensitive things I want to discuss with this… gentleman in private. Boring research stuff, you know? And like you said… it may not even be a chargeable offense. I need to have some more information from him first, ok?”

“Al-right,” Tess responded with more than a little doubt and hesitation. “But I’ll be right inside if you need me. Cell is on.”

“Got it.” Evan watched as Tess turned on her heel and walked back through the sliding doors into the ER. “Ok, now that we have some privacy, I want the truth. No messing around trying to lie to me, because I’m not the gullible type. This is about Catherine and her… special friend, isn’t it?”

JT sighed, realizing that the damage was already done, thanks to Vincent’s heroics, and there was no hope but to come clean and hope that his friendship with Catherine would be enough to convince the good doctor to keep his mouth shut about the whole incident. “Yeah, yeah it is. I hear you uh… ‘met’ Vincent earlier…”

For all that Evan had pieced together, that surprised him the most. Apparently that poor monster had gone straight to the little vandal and somehow grunted and relayed in broken language what had happened. Would wonders never cease…

“Wait a minute. Did you just call him Vincent?” Evan questioned. Where had he heard that name recently…

“Uhh well…” JT realized he had just given Evan more information than he’d already pieced together. Damn.

Evan’s eyes went wide as the proverbial light went on. “Is that… creature… Vincent Keller? Is that why forensic evidence makes him appear to be a little too alive and well for a guy with a death certificate?”

JT’s head dropped as he let out a loud sigh. Half of New York was going to be in on their secret soon, the way things were going. “It’s really a long story, but to answer your question, yes, he’s Vincent Keller.”

Evan nodded. “Well then, yes, I met the former Dr. Keller at the accident scene. It was obvious he had nothing to do with what happened and that he was only trying to help… this time.” Now that the beast had a name, Evan was finding it impossible to continue thinking of him as an “it.” “But that doesn’t explain the DNA samples we have of him found at numerous other crime scenes all over New York. Including the night I was kidnapped.” Evan held up a hand to stop the flood of verbiage threatening to spill from JT’s mouth. “That said, I trust Catherine implicitly, and for some reason she has been protecting Keller for quite a while now I suspect, and out of respect for her I will reserve final judgment until I have a chance to talk with her and find out why.” Crossing his arms over his chest he added, “So now… why don’t you tell me who you are, and what you were doing in my lab, hmm?”

JT blew out the breath he’d been holding in. “OK… JT Forbes, biochem professor. In all honesty, I was there using your DNA analyzer because I needed it to formulate a serum from some notes we found in Vanessa Chandler’s research related to these… fugue states that her ‘super-soldiers’ were experiencing. Vincent had never exhibited any of the symptoms while he was in the program, and had blocked most of his memories of the experiments until recently. Anyway, long story short, I needed the equipment to try and find a solution to Vincent’s lapses into animal insanity. So far it appears to be working, so…”

“JT! What the hell are you doing?!” Vincent growled from the shadows. “Why don’t you just get a producer and make a Lifetime movie about it? Whatever happened to ‘tell no one’?!”

“What?!? YOU are lecturing ME about exposure? After what you pulled tonight? He already knows bits and pieces and thinks he knows more than he does. I’d say that makes him more dangerous than if he knew the whole truth at this point!” JT was keeping his voice to a hoarse whisper, but he was in full rant mode. With Vincent’s super hearing he didn’t have to talk very loud to know his friend could understand him, even though Evan could only make out half of what he was saying.

“I know but you didn’t have to confirm what your involvement in this mess is!”

“Hey, you opened Pandora’s Box when you let Cat in on our secret. This is just going to keep cascading out of control because you can’t stay away from each other.”

Serum ingredients: $296.34. Pilfered lab equipment usage: $0.00. But the look on Evan Marks’ face at the moment he realized the disembodied voice in the bushes belonged to Vincent Keller - speaking like a normal human? Priceless. JT could almost envision the commercial for it now. He dipped his head to look at his shoes in a vain attempt to hide a smirk he couldn’t contain, despite it being rather inappropriate under the circumstances. Nothing about this situation was remotely amusing. Strange, how the mind reacts to stress sometimes.

Evan looked first from JT to the shadowy figure standing by the bushes, and back to JT with utter confusion. Sure, this voice was deep and gravelly and Evan recognized some of the timbre of the voice he’d heard come from the beast at the accident scene, yet this was totally and unmistakably human. Thinking he must be confused – that this couldn’t possibly be Vincent Keller lurking in the darkness - he carefully edged his way into the shadows off the sidewalk path. Just before Evan got close enough to make out his features, Vincent leaned in suddenly and went, “BOO!” Evan nearly jumped out of his skin, and Vincent couldn’t help but laugh at the way his heart started racing.

Evan scowled as he looked at Vincent, making sure that was indeed who stood facing him. No doubt about it. “Very funny, Keller. I’d think given the fact that I could make life very difficult for you, you’d be a little nicer to me.”

Vincent raised an eyebrow, crossing his arms over his chest in a parody of Evan’s earlier gesture meant to intimidate JT. “Is that so?” he asked mockingly. He took a menacing step closer to Evan, who stood frozen in place. Leaning in just a bit so he was eye to eye with his adversary, he explained, “Well see, I’d say that given the fact I saw you kiss the woman I’m in love with, I am being nice. You know… relatively speaking.” GOD it felt SO GOOD to admit that he loved Catherine out loud! Vincent had all he could do not to climb on a roof and shout it to the whole world.

Chapter Four - Revelations

Evan tried to laugh but it came out somewhat strangled, what with his heart lodged in his throat at the way Vincent was glaring at him. “Y-you’re in love with her are you? Does she know this?” He felt triumphant when he saw the smile disappear off Vincent’s face. His victory was to be short lived, however.

“Yeah- er, well… she did… I think. But I did something really stupid tonight and I’m pretty sure she was coming to find me when the accident happened. God, I was such a fool to think I could walk away from her like that.” Vincent turned so he was no longer hovering in Evan’s personal space, jamming his hands into his pockets in a defeated gesture. Tears welled in his eyes and he swallowed hard against the emotion that overwhelmed him. “If anything happens to her because I wasn’t there to protect her…”

“Wait… tonight? But Catherine was at her father’s wedding and reception. How could you-“ Evan’s brow furrowed as he got a flash of insight and some more of the dots seemed to be connecting themselves. A memory of the beast holding Catherine wearing a suit skittered across his consciousness. “She told you about my research, didn’t she? That’s why she was grilling me for information. You were there?”

“Yeah, I was. But when she told me what you’d found, I kinda freaked. Said some things I’m not proud of, and walked away from her because if what you say is true, how could I ever ask her to go through that with me? Although I’ll admit, I was kind of hoping she’d try to stop me, but… she didn’t. I guess in the end it really was just too much to hope that this thing between us would work out.”

“Wait a minute, back the bus up,” JT interrupted. “What research? Findings? Vincent, what the hell are you not telling me?”

“Sorry, JT, there just hasn’t been time…”

“I’ve been studying Vincent’s DNA from old crime scenes where allegedly he was trying to help victims.” Evan’s voice held a note of skepticism, but he refrained from making any overt accusations, even though there were several other people that it seemed Vincent had clearly murdered along the way. He’d deal with that later when he talked to Cat. If I get a chance to talk to her again…. He looked toward the ER entrance with concern. He wished they could just know if she was going to make it or not so he could stop worrying.

“Monster Headquarters to Evan,” JT’s voice broke through the haze Evan had slipped into thinking about Catherine. “So you’ve been studying Vincent?” He rubbed his temples to try and stave off a raging headache. “Seriously, I’ll wait and freak out about that later. What did you find?”

“It’s his uh… DNA… specifically the L2 capsid. It’s mutating. Basically, the animal nucleotides are taking over for the human ones. He’s becoming less… human.”

“Hey, standing right here,” Vincent interrupted with a wave. “Stop talking about me like I’m invisible. And like I told Catherine, I feel fine. Never better.”

“Yes, well clearly there are things about you I don’t know or understand,” Evan allowed. “Like, how it is, you appear to be a perfectly normal male one minute, and a beast the next? And how this even happened to you? JT mentioned ‘super-soldiers’?”

Vincent briefly explained the whole Operation Muirfield thing and how adrenaline triggered the change in him. “Muirfield is the reason I pretended to be dead. They put out an order to exterminate all of us. I’m the only one from the project that has survived because of it. Up until a few months ago, JT was the only other person who knew I’m alive. But Catherine found out, and Muirfield sent assassins out after her, kidnapped her, and tried to get her to turn against me and give me up. His head dropped in shame as he thought of how faithful she had been to him, and how he’d failed to give her the one thing she apparently needed – hope. He continued without looking up, but his voice was softer and strained with emotion for the remorse that was gripping him. “She never even entertained the idea of turning me in, you know? She kept insisting that I’m not a monster, even though they showed her pictures of things I’d been involved in. She had doubts about me, but she never gave up on me, even when I did. I turned myself in to protect her and JT, and she stormed the place to get me back.” He did lift his face then, staring up into the night sky, and Evan could see a lone tear sliding down his cheek as he added, “She is the most… amazing woman I’ve ever known.”

“Yes, she is,” Evan agreed, “even more than I realized, apparently. It makes sense now why she has been keeping us all at a distance lately, but I can’t believe she went through this alone. At any rate, I don’t want to see her hurt. Surely you can understand that.”

“I would never hurt her!” Vincent insisted.

“Maybe not physically,” Evan allowed. “At least… not yet. But if we can’t do something to stabilize your DNA and stop the mutation, eventually you’ll become too dangerous for her to be around. But that’s not what really worries me. I don’t want to see you break her heart. Cat is… one of the kindest, gentlest people I know, sometimes to a fault. She wears this tough shell to keep everyone around her at bay, but there have been rare moments where I’ve seen her vulnerable when she thought no one was looking. So if she’s let her guard down with you, it’s pretty serious, and you could hurt her badly without even realizing it, because she’s gotten so good at hiding from everyone. For example, you said you wanted her to try and stop you from leaving this evening… but did it ever occur to you that she thought you were rejecting her? And that’s why she let you go? Because she thought you really just wanted to get away from her?”

“No, I would never-!” Vincent was devastated. Could Catherine really have thought he wanted her out of his life? After all they had been through? Once she had told him that it never occurred to her that he didn’t know he was the best thing in her life… but had he ever told her she was the best thing in his? Let her know how much he cared for her, even if he hadn’t dared tell her how much he loved her? No. He’d been just as guilty as she of assuming that they were on the same page regarding their feelings. How could he have been so blind? Not to mention selfish. He was so busy feeling sorry for himself for this whole miserable situation that he hadn’t fully appreciated the beautiful gift that Catherine had given him – herself. Her hopes, her dreams, and her acceptance… she had put it all out there for him, and what had he done? Walked away and left her standing there, all alone in it. He sorted through his feelings in silence, and Evan waited patiently as he did so. Finally Vincent spoke. “I swear to you… I will talk to her and get this sorted out.”

“Well this is all touching,” JT stated, “but can we get back to business? Marks, you said something about ‘we’ when you mentioned stabilizing Vincent’s DNA. Does this mean you’re willing to help us?”

“Are you kidding? Do you really think I would miss the chance of a lifetime for this kind of research experience? Besides, I already got a huge grant for this project.” Evan grinned like a little kid who’d just been given the keys to the candy shop.

“What are you… nuts? We can’t do this out in the open and then just publish it. Vincent’s life is at stake here! Nothing has changed. No one can know he’s alive. Muirfield has already figured it out, but if he gets named in some cross-species DNA study, everyone that works on the project will be on the Muirfield hit list. These people don’t play nice.”

“Well maybe there’s a way that we can research the principles that we’d need to formulate a cure for Vincent, without actually naming him as a subject in the study.” Evan grew thoughtful. “It’s too bad we don’t have the original research from the project that created you. It might make things easier.” Something was niggling at the back of his brain… something that JT said earlier… “Wait a minute. Did you say Vanessa Chandler’s notes helped you make that serum for Vincent?”

“Yes…” JT answered hesitantly.

“Are we talking, Vanessa Chandler as in Cat’s mother?”

“One and the same.”

“She was an infectious disease specialist. What was she doing with notes on cross-species DNA?” Evan was feeling confused, and yet he sensed some more pieces were starting to line up, about to fall into place.

It was Vincent who answered. “Catherine’s mother worked for Muirfield. She’s the one that headed the project.”

“Oh my God,” Evan murmured. “So then… her murder… it wasn’t random, was it?”

“Not in the least. She knew too much, and she was interested in helping us, not having us all killed to clean up their mess. I think she became too big a liability, so they killed her to shut her up.”

“That means… the night that she died… you were there obviously. You saved Cat’s life, didn’t you? That’s why you killed those men. You were protecting her.” Evan was beginning to understand why the bond between Catherine and Vincent was so strong.

Vincent scuffed at the ground with his foot. “I wasn’t there in time to save Dr. Chandler,” he confessed sadly. He lifted his head and stared into Evan’s eyes with such intensity, Evan swore they were starting to… glow. “But as long as I live, I will never regret killing those men. They were hired assassins, and if I hadn’t killed them, Catherine would have died right then and there. She was just a kid practically, with her whole life ahead of her. What would you have done?” Vincent threw the ball squarely into Evan’s court and waited for a response, while he struggled to get his heart rate and respiration back to normal. The moment of truth had come – would Evan finally realize that Vincent didn’t like to kill? That he did so only when innocent lives were threatened?

“And if you hadn’t come into that tunnel when you did and killed Hollingsworth, I would be dead.” Evan couldn’t condone vigilantism, obviously, but it seemed that there was at least some moral justification for the situations where Vincent crossed the line. “Tell me… what about the FBI agents in the subway tunnel? That was obviously your… work. Why them?”

Vincent’s hands balled into fists as he remembered the horror of that night. His jaw tensed, and his voice was little more than a controlled growl. “Muirfield assassins. They were trying to kill Catherine. They had thrown her down onto the tracks and were going to kill her and leave her for the train to destroy the evidence.”

Evan recalled how they had found Catherine’s cell phone on the tracks. Neither he nor Tess had gotten a satisfactory explanation as to why she’d been on the F train platform that evening. Until now. “The bastards.” Evan was starting to get angry now, too. They had tried to kill Cat! And the one thing he hated more than a vigilante with a moral compass was “The Company” killing innocent civilians and somehow thinking they could operate “above the law”. He had to agree with Vincent in spirit, if not in methodology, that these criminals needed to be brought to justice.

Vincent started to relax marginally, seeing that Evan was beginning to comprehend the stakes in this dangerous life he was being forced to live. “I don’t know what else to tell you, man, except that I don’t like killing. I was a doctor. It goes against everything I ever believed in. But when it comes to kill or be killed? Or worse – to have Catherine’s life threatened? I won’t hesitate to kill again. If that makes me some sort of evil monster, so be it. But I think self-defense is still justified under the law, isn’t it?”

Evan gave him a sad smile. “Yes, it is. It’s just too bad you have to repeatedly be put in that position. Perhaps one day you won’t be. In the meantime, however, we need to figure out how to stop your DNA from mutating any more than it already has. I don’t think I have to explain why that has to be priority one.” Vincent nodded in agreement.

“Well we still don’t know exactly what the serum we made was designed to do, or how it affected Vincent’s… condition,” JT interjected. “I mean, I had no way of running DNA analysis after Vincent injected himself with it, against my better judgment I might add…” He gave Vincent a reprimanding look.

“Hey JT, chill man. I haven’t had any blackouts since I took the serum, and for the hundredth time, I. feel. fine! Maybe Catherine was right. Maybe that’s what those fugue-things were – my DNA starting to mutate. And just maybe, that’s what Dr. C’s serum was supposed to fix.”

“The serum wasn’t an antidote, Vincent. It was designed to treat the evident symptoms of the condition, not cure what ails you… so to speak.”

“Well once we know that Catherine is out of danger we can start running some tests and see what’s what –“ Evan broke off mid-thought as Vincent dove for the bushes. “What the -?”

Chapter Five - Prognosis

Tess flung open the doors to the ER. “She’s out of surgery!” she called in their direction. “Doc’s gonna be here in a minute to let us know what’s going on.”

“Coming!” Evan called back, and Tess disappeared back inside. He heard Vincent crawling out of the shrubs and raised an eyebrow at JT for explanation.

“Super hearing,” JT informed him. “One of the perks.”

“Come on,” Vincent barked as he blew past them on his way to the doors. “Let’s find out how Catherine’s doing.”

“Whoa whoa wait a minute big guy!” JT yelled, running to catch up with him. “What do you think you’re doing? You gonna just waltz in there like some normal guy that doesn’t have a death certificate on file? Are you serious?”

“JT, no one has to know my name or who I am. I’ll lurk in a corner away from the rest of you. With my ‘super hearing’ as you put it, I don’t have to be standing in front of the doctor to still hear his report.”

“Yes, but If I know you – and I think I do by now – you’re going to want to ‘talk shop’ and ask questions, and the temptation to discuss her condition will gnaw at you until you cave and get involved. And then what? What if he recognizes you?”

“I doubt he will, JT,” Vincent answered, stopping just before the automatic doors would sense his presence and open. “I was only a resident and it wasn’t here, it was at St. Benjamin’s. So unless he worked the ER there 10 years ago, he wouldn’t have a clue as to who I am. Look, I promise I’ll be careful. And if by some freak thing I do happen to know him I promise I’ll keep my distance.” He pulled the brim of his cap down a little lower over his eyes. “Now let’s get in there before we miss the doctor altogether and all this arguing becomes a moot point.” Vincent went in first, looked around and saw Tess and Heather just getting up to greet the doctor. He turned and walked in the opposite direction, finding a seat in a quiet corner to position himself so he could eavesdrop.

Evan and JT strolled in together and walked up just as the surgeon was introducing himself. “She came through the surgery with flying colors,” he reported “The bullet, as you know, had gone clean through. She’ll be pretty sore for a while but she should make a full recovery. Fortunately she was wearing her seatbelt and didn’t sustain any life-threatening internal injuries, just some cuts and bruises, and a broken ankle. The biggest thing we have to watch her for is a concussion.”

“What about the other woman who was brought in from the accident?” Tess thought to ask. “Is she still alive?”

“Sadly there was nothing we could do for her. She was DOA.”

“Aww gee isn’t that just too bad,” Tess muttered under her breath.

“I’m sorry,” the surgeon said, getting a little edge to his voice. “I don’t know what your issues with the other woman were, but your comment is pretty inappropriate considering your friend apparently killed her.”

Tess whipped out her badge. “That other woman was a psycho-matchmaker who tried to kill my partner, if you must know. She’d already killed one man, and after Detective Chandler interrogated her, she knew she was going down for it. Apparently she figured she had nothing to lose, so why not kill the cop that spoiled it all for her? Now, forgive me, but inappropriate or not, I’m glad she can’t do any more damage.”

“My apologies for misreading the situation. But our professional objectives are not always compatible, as I’m sure you know. My goal is to preserve life whenever possible. I can’t allow moral judgments to impair my ability to do my job. Those are best left for the legal system. In your line of work, you see the worst of humanity on a daily basis. I imagine it gets frustrating when you feel justice isn’t served.”

“It sure does. So you’ll please forgive me if I don’t get all torn up about the way this one turned out.”

“Understood, detective. At any rate, Ms. Chandler is going to be in ICU at least until she regains consciousness and we see how she’s doing. You may go check in on her one at a time for no more than 5 minutes before you leave. She’s still sedated from the surgery so she won’t respond to you, just so you know. You can call about her status in the morning to see if she can have visitors. She’s in ICU 104. The nurses can direct you.”

“Thanks so much, doctor,” Evan said, extending his hand.

“Certainly,” the surgeon replied as he clasped the offered hand in a firm shake. “Hopefully your friend will be out of here in a couple of days. Now if you’ll excuse me I have another patient to tend.” As he walked away, JT turned to make eye contact with Vincent, only to find his friend was nowhere to be seen. Now where had he ducked off to…? He trailed after Tess, Heather, and Evan as they went to the nurses’ station and got directions to ICU. All the way there, JT kept looking around nervously for some sign of Vincent. He knew it was too much to hope for, that Vincent had gone home. He was lurking around here somewhere, JT was sure of it.

*******************************

“Oh Cat,” Heather whined with a sniffle as she held her sister’s hand. “You have to pull through this. I need you big sis. Who else can I sit up all night with eating ice cream and crying over my train wreck of a love life?” She gave a teary laugh. “Although just between you and me, I really really like Evan.” She waved her hand dismissively, even though Catherine couldn’t see her. “Oh I know you said he’s a flirt, but who knows? Maybe I can be the one to make him settle down.” She choked back a sob as she bent to kiss Catherine’s forehead. You rest, and I’ll talk to you in the morning ok? I love you Cat.” She walked out of the room and Tess gave her a hug before going in.

“Hey partner,” Tess said softly as she walked up to Catherine’s bed. She gently brushed a stray lock of hair from her friend’s cheek. “You need to get better quick and get back on your feet. What am I gonna do without you? I mean, you know my luck. Joe will try to stick me with Wolanski for a partner. Next thing you know MY name will be on the police blotter for assault. That guy seriously winds me up.” She took Catherine’s hand and gave it a little squeeze. “I need you, Cat. You’re the only thing that keeps me sane in that testosterone jungle.” Tess just stood and watched Catherine breathe for a couple more minutes, before releasing her hand and leaving the room.

Evan slipped into ICU 104 and just stood by the door watching Catherine for a minute. So much had happened in the last couple hours, it was hard to process it all. Who was this woman that he thought he knew? This beautiful, vivacious girl that made him laugh, and was always finding some extra project at work to rope him into? He smiled remembering some of the “favors” she’d managed to get him to do for her.

It was a shame that she would never know what she meant to him. He knew that she saw him as a player, but that was what he’d always wanted her to think. The truth was, and he was finally ready to admit it to himself, he let her think that to keep her at arm’s length because he was scared. More like terrified, he thought. Deep inside, he knew that she was the one that could make him break his 3 month rule. But he just wasn’t sure if he was the marrying type. And Catherine deserved that. She deserved… everything. After all she’d been through, he didn’t want to be just one more failed relationship for her to agonize over. He wanted to see her happy – truly happy.

His thoughts turned to Vincent. Something told him here was someone that could give Cat her “happy ever after” if they could somehow find a way to at least keep his DNA from mutating any further than it already had. It was obvious that Keller was totally smitten with Catherine, and her feelings for him must be pretty powerful if she was willing to risk not only her relationships with friends and family, but her career and reputation to protect this poor tortured man. Joe had made it crystal clear that he wanted the rogue vigilante hauled in and brought to justice. If Cat was found harboring a known fugitive on Joe’s 10 most wanted list, she was going to have bigger problems to worry about than desk duty.

Evan sighed. Who the hell was he kidding? They all were going to be in serious trouble if they got found out. All the more reason not to bring Tess into it. She’d never forgive them after her last brush with desk duty. He pushed himself off the wall he’d leaned against and crossed the room to her bedside. “Ah, sweet Catherine. What a fine mess we’ve all landed ourselves in, eh? So now I know your deep, dark secret that you’ve been keeping from us all. What I need is for you to wake up and tell me why you’re risking everything to help Vincent Keller. And while you’re at it, maybe you can explain why the hell I’m sticking my neck out too. You must be rubbing off on me.” He smiled sadly as he leaned down to brush a kiss on her lips. “Be well, sweetheart. And be happy. Now that I know why you kept turning me down, I won’t pressure you anymore.”

When Evan left the room, Tess had already gone. He looked at JT, who was waiting for his 5 minutes with Cat, and said, “I have to take Heather home, and let her dad know what’s happened.” He pulled out his wallet and removed a business card. “Here’s my number – when the dust settles, give me a call ok? We can start discussing our… collaboration.”

JT nodded. “Yeah, I will. And Marks? Thanks.” He watched as Evan pulled Heather to his side and escorted her out of ICU. When they were out of sight he took a deep breath and entered Cat’s room.

There was something so wrong about seeing her lying there like that, he thought. So still… surrounded by the beeping and buzzing of machines tending to her broken body. He thought of all the times she had gone to bat for Vincent, and he felt ashamed of the way he’d treated her. He had come to realize that even though she may have crossed the lines sometimes, it was only because she had to learn where they were. He and Vincent had been living with those lines for 10 years. It was all new territory for her. And she had adjusted. In the end, her fierce loyalty to Vincent was more than he expected or ever could have hoped for.

“Hey Cat,” he murmured as he stood next to the bed watching her. “I, uh… I just want to say how sorry I am for the way I’ve treated you. I guess I’ve been protecting Vincent for so long, it never occurred to me that there might be someone in this crazy world that could really love him in spite of everything he has going on. It wasn’t that I was afraid you were going to rat him out; I just don’t want to see him get hurt, you know? I realize that must sound silly, he’s a big boy and all… but he’s lonely. I’ve had to give up a lot in the social life department, but I still get to have a life. Vincent has nothing. Or at least… he had nothing until you came into his life.” He paused. “I guess what I’m trying to say is, thank you. Thank you for seeing Vincent for who he is as a man and loving him as he is. I promise I’ll be less of a jerk to you when you’re back on your feet, ok? Just… get better. Vincent needs you. We all need you.”

JT hesitantly reached out and patted Catherine’s hand before turning and walking out. He never stopped as he exited the room; just kept on going until he reached his car. There was no point waiting around for Vincent. He’d find his own way home when he was good and ready. And JT was pretty sure that wouldn’t be any time soon.

Chapter Six – Inner Turmoil

Several minutes after JT left ICU, the door to the supply closet next to Catherine’s room opened, and Vincent slipped from one room to the next, cleverly disguised in some scrubs and a lab coat that he had “appropriated”. He shut the door behind him, and silently willed the staff to stay away. He didn’t want to have to come up with an on-the-spot story as to who he was and what he was doing in there, but if it came to that he would. Nothing was going to stand in his way of being with Catherine.

He pulled a chair up to her bedside and dropped into it. He was exhausted after the emotional rollercoaster he’d been on all evening. Reaching out, he lifted her slender hand and placed it in his own, cradling it gently for fear of hurting her with his unnatural grip. Normally he had control of himself, but being this emotional, he was afraid he’d be distracted enough to forget his own strength. He stared at her face, his thumb tenderly stroking the back of her hand as if willing the contact between them to wake her. He knew she needed rest, but he needed to know she was really going to be ok. And he needed to tell her –

What? His brow furrowed in thought. What exactly would he say to her when she woke up? I’m sorry? Sorry for walking away? Sorry that I’m not… human? His mind was in such a jumble, he didn’t know how he’d ever sort it all out. There was only one thing that he knew for sure – he loved Catherine with every beat of his heart. And apparently it was more than just a fleeting feeling, because he realized something tonight for the first time; not only did he love Catherine, but his beast loved her as well. It went far beyond protecting an innocent with her – his beast was protecting his chosen mate. That was why her touch could calm him when he couldn’t calm himself. With her, he felt… safe. Ironic, he thought, how all this time she thought he was saving her, but in reality, she was saving him. In so many ways, day after day, she gave him what he needed to carry on - her hope, her faith, her friendship… her love. She’d never said the words, but he had seen it in her eyes too many times to not notice. Oh, he had tried to ignore it, afraid to trust that she wouldn’t one day just get tired of the whole mess. But how many times had she risked her own life to save his? It upset him at the time, because all he wanted to do was make sure she was safe. His love for her wouldn’t consider any other option.

His brow furrowed as a new thought came to him. Was it like that for her, too? Was that why she kept fighting for him, believing in him, trying to protect him at risk to herself? Because her love demanded the same commitment from her? Could it be that she actually loved him enough that living without him would bring her the same pain that he would endure if she were ripped from his life? He was afraid to hope.

Craving her touch, he lifted her hand and placed it against his cheek, as she had done so many times. Every time she did that something primal inside of him wanted to howl, it touched him so deeply. Now he just squeezed his eyes shut, tears seeping from between his lashes, thinking how close he had come to losing her tonight. And she still wasn’t out of the woods.

Even without looking at the monitor, Vincent was aware of the change in Catherine’s heart rate and respiration. Her head started tossing back and forth on the pillow as if in the throes of a terrifying nightmare. “No…. Vincent… please….” She let out a little sob and her voice grew hoarse, tight with emotion. “Please don’t leave me…”

Vincent vaulted out of the chair and leaned over her, stroking her hair, brushing his lips against her forehead, trying everything he could think of to soothe her. “Sshh Catherine, it’s ok. I’m here... I’m here. I’m not going anywhere, I promise.” He was totally humbled. Evan had been right apparently. Because Catherine’s subconscious was expressing what her broken heart wouldn’t let her say to him at the reception. She had wanted him to stay, but she thought he didn’t want to be with her! Just when he thought he couldn’t possibly love her or want to protect her any more than he did, he discovered there was no limit to the feelings his precious Catherine could stir in him. He nuzzled her cheek with his, softly kissed it, and then whispered in her ear, “Come back to me Catherine. I can’t do this by myself any more. I need you here with me.” He swallowed hard against the lump in his throat.

Once more he lifted her hand and brought it to his lips to place a tender kiss in her palm. As he did, he felt her fingers curl slightly and brush his jawline. His eyes darted to her face, and he watched her lashes flutter as if she was trying to wake from her sleep. He leaned down again and stroked her face. “That’s it,” he encouraged her. “You’re almost back. You’re strong – you can do it. Fight for it.” Vincent knew he was being selfish, but he had to know she was going to be alright. He felt like his whole world was coming apart at the thought of possibly losing her.

“Vincent,” she whispered, her eyes still closed. He thought he’d never heard a sweeter sound in all his life. He gently rubbed his thumb over her lips.

“Hey beautiful,” he whispered back. His breath caught when she ever so softly kissed the pad of his thumb. He wondered what it would be like to have her warm lips pressed to his own. Slowly her lashes lifted until she could gaze the short distance into his eyes.

“Hey,” she answered dreamily, her lips lifting in a barely perceptible smile. “You’re… here.” Vincent noticed her struggling to swallow and brought the small glass of water from her bedside table to her lips for her to sip. She closed her eyes again and sighed. “Thanks.” She could hear him put the cup back, then felt him tenderly brush her hair from her face. She made the effort to open her eyes again. “Vincent… we need… to talk,” she managed to say.

“Shh I know,” he replied. “You’ve had a rough night, so how about I talk and you listen?” Catherine nodded and closed her eyes again. She would let him have his say, but then she was going to finish the conversation. There were things he had to know…

“Catherine, I want – no, I need to apologize to you for earlier…” Vincent sank down into the chair by her bed, his elbows on his knees, hands clasped together as he stared at the floor. “I told you once before, I don’t know how to do this. This whole… situation.” He glanced up briefly, but found it hard to maintain eye contact with all the emotions running rampant inside him and looked away again. “It’s been… a really long time since I’ve had any kind of relationship with, you know, a woman…” He could feel his cheeks burning hot with embarrassment. “If things with me were… normal… this would be so much different. Easier. But I am what I am, y’know? And you…” Vincent blew out a deep breath. Summoning all his courage, he raised his eyes and his gaze collided with hers. “You are not a normal woman.” He could see the uncertainty in her eyes at his words and rushed on to explain, “What I mean to say is… you are the most amazing woman I’ve ever known.” His looked back to his hands, where he was rubbing his thumbs together nervously. “You’re like… ten times better than any fantasy I ever had of the perfect woman. And I’m like, this hideous monster, and you deserve so much better than that. And as if that wasn’t enough, now I find out that what I am… is likely going to get worse. If I thought I was being selfish before to think we could ever… have some sort of relationship… now it would be just insane of me to want you to have to go through whatever it is that I’m going to turn into. For all we know, it may not stop until there’s nothing left of me.” He reached out and took her hand and lifted it to rub his cheek against the back of it. “But I want you to know, the one thing that I never meant to make you feel is that I was rejecting you. I walked away tonight because I finally realized I can’t ask you to throw your life away on me. You don’t need to go into a relationship knowing that one day I’m going to break your heart, no matter how much I…” Vincent swallowed hard against the emotion choking him, “no matter how much I care about you.”

Catherine could feel the wetness of his tears on the back of her hand where it still rested against his cheek. What strength and courage it must have taken for him to make such an emotional sacrifice for her! He hadn’t said the words, but she understood what he hadn’t spoken. Now it was her turn to make amends. “Vincent,” she whispered, knowing full well he could hear her. When he looked up at her, she closed her eyes as if she was exhausted. “Come closer,” she breathed. Vincent honored her wish and rose from his chair to lean over her. She slowly removed her hand from his and placed her palm on his cheek. Slipping her fingers into his hair she curled her fingers slightly around the back of his head and using gentle pressure she urged him to bring his face closer to hers. “Help me sit up,” she asked when they were almost nose to nose.

“Catherine, I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he reasoned. “You should lie still.”

“I’ll rest afterward. It’s only for a moment, I promise. Please. Just slide your arm under me if you would…” As Vincent did so, it gave her all the leverage and element of surprise she needed to close the distance between them and fuse her lips to his.

Sunday, November 16, 2014

Sequel to "Save You, Save Me" in the works

Saturday, March 30, 2013

Beauty and the Beast 10 Commandments*

Saturday, December 29, 2012

Save You, Save Me (BATB fic)

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Introductions